Lonely? Insecure?
Pastor Phil
The thought of my suffering and loneliness and disconnection is bitter beyond words. Lam 3.19
“Let me tell you this: if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it’s not because they enjoy solitude. It’s because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.”
Jodi Picoult, My Sister’s Keeper
“Men in their 30s and 40s report the most frequent use of pornography. A majority (57 percent) of men ages 30–49 report having watched pornography in the past month, and 42 percent say they have watched it in the past week. In contrast, 44 percent of young men and only 26 percent of senior men say they have watched pornography at some point during the past month.” Institute for Family Studies
Studies show that loneliness and insecurity are two strong drivers of pornography among men.
I’ll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness, the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve swallowed. I remember it all—oh, how well I remember— the feeling of hitting the bottom. But there’s one other thing I remember, and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:
Lamentations 3:19-21 MSG
What is going on?
The massive porn and sex trafficking industries are disturbing. But they don’t exist without customers. Those customers are mainly men. Those men find it increasingly hard to connect in healthy relationships with women.
Why are we so disconnected as a society? Men in search of healthy relationships that they can’t find turn to unhealthy substitutes. Women who struggle to relate to men in healthy ways. All of us are lonely.
Remain united to me, and I will remain united to you. A branch cannot bear fruit by itself; it can do so only if it remains in the vine. In the same way, you cannot bear fruit unless you remain in me.
John 15:4 GNT
Part of the good news in a Christian world is an interconnectedness with others. Healthy and secure relationships are part of God’s plan for His people. Pursue getting connected.
Sure, it is scary. In a world of disconnection, how do we connect?
Start with some conversation in private with God. He’s a good listener. Talk. Listen
Drop by a church service and hang out in the back. Don’t jump in. Watch for a while.
Find someone you trust a little and get together around a harmless activity.
Finally, look for an opportunity to share a little and hear a little.
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